Little Souls

I’m peeling away the layers of my emotions as one would peel away the protective riding gear after an untimely slide down the asphalt. As happens, life is not all joy riding, happy motorcycle travels or shopping for bike toys. Just as the flesh oozes with anguish from angry road rash, so are my emotions. I dab at them as with antiseptic and try to sooth myself with sleep to shut out the world.

Our family has suffered a loss. It leaves me stepping away from the bike, folding my gloves, and hanging my helmet by the strap. Then slipping the jacket from my arms, I wrap them around my daughter and try to console her. She has suffered a loss so profoundly deep, that only others who have been here can understand. Her joy, only so recently shared, has turned into grief. The new life within her has been cut short. The ripple is spreading wide, and we are taken up in the wake of sorrow for her and for us. For we have suffered too; suffered a loss, a dream, a hope and a promise.

While our grandchild’s heart has ceased to pulse with life, this child will not soon be forgotten. This child will live forever in our memory and in our hearts. Left behind are two parents that loved this child from conception. In our helplessness, we scoop the other babies in our arms and realize, as if for the first time, the true miracle of life. As my daughter moves forward stepping each day away from this sorrow, she tries to be hopeful.

“I know there is a little soul out there that needs a home. I don't know when, but I do know it will happen.”

I know too, that she will be ready when that time comes.